If you leave
by Montanaluvmesser101
Summary: Written for a challenge on LiveJournal...cheesy songs...my song was If you Leave by OMD. Danny leaves Lindsay...but how? D/L warning character death


A/N: Written for a challenge on LiveJournal...for cheesy songs...my song was If you leave by OMD...so I twisted it around and...

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"_Are you sure this is the right way?" Lindsay asked Danny as he frantically looked around him. He shrugged and looked at her. She read the directions Flack had given them again._

"_Montana, you've read that thousands of times and we're still in the same place." He laughed._

"_Well if you would stop being the typical man and ask for directions then maybe we could get at the crime scene today!" her temper got the better of her as she raised her voice to him. She didn't mean to…it was just hormones getting to her._

"_Hey, hey hunni, I was just kidding." Danny lowered his voice to a whisper and stroked her cheek. She moved her head and rested on his hand._

"_I know…I'm sorry, it's just…I don't feel well." She admitted. Danny pulled over and turned to her._

"_Look at me Linds." He said, and when she didn't obey he gently forced her head to look at him. she looked into his blue eyes that she loved so much, they looked so concerned._

"_You should have asked Mac for time off. He'd understand if you'd tell him about…" he rubbed his hand over her flat stomach. Although the baby was still small, causing no enlargement to Lindsay's figure, Danny still loved rubbing his hand over where his son lay. He knew it was going to be a boy, even if Lindsay hated it when he said it was going to be a boy. She of course, wanted a little girl, to be her daddy's little girl…but Danny knew that the real reason was that Lindsay couldn't cope having two handsome boys in the Messer family, and being out numbered. She shook her head._

"_No Danny, I want to work. I want to be with you." She softly said, placing her hand on top of his as they both stroked the area where their baby lay._

"_I'll always be with you Linds…no matter where you are…you and my boy." He smiled when he saw a smirk on Lindsay's face appear._

"_Deep Messer. And…how many times do I have to tell you, it's not going to be a boy." She rolled her eyes._

"_It so is Montana…I bet you a Benjamin." The bet didn't really work seeing as last time, Lindsay won…and they were far away from a pool table so Danny couldn't exactly give her something better. _

"_I can't believe you just bet on the sex of your unborn child Messer." She laughed at him as he stuck his tongue out at her. _

"_Just 'coz you know I'm right." He nuzzled her nose to stop her from talking…how many times does she have to get the last word? This time, it was Danny's turn to win. She smiled and kissed his lips tenderly before pulling away and looking around one last time. They were looking for an alleyway, down 31__st__ street…but there were many alleyways and Flack's description didn't exactly point out any specific place different from the rest. It wasn't until a gunshot pointed out their destination and the two exchanged a look of worry. Danny got out of the car and leaned in through the open door._

"_Stay there. You've got to…you've got to say you will" His voice was full of fear if Lindsay moved, and she felt that, so she obeyed the words of her boyfriend and waited anxiously as he disappeared around the corner of a building. She sighed and felt even more sick, butterflies flying around her stomach. Something inside of her knew something wasn't right. Danny had only left a few seconds, but it had felt like hours. She hadn't wanted him to leave. She bounced her feet up and down, waiting…then she glanced over to his seat…and her eyes widened. Lying where he had sat was his gun. He was unarmed._

"_Shit!" she whispered and, even though told not to, grabbed his gun and ran outside of the SUV. She ran to where he had turned, but stopped dead in her tracks before turning when she heard another gun shot. She closed her eyes and stopped breathing. Her heart stopped beating and she felt like throwing up. either Danny had got the gun of…someone…or that someone had…she couldn't bear thing of what could be waiting for her when she turned around. She wouldn't. She would go back to the SUV and wait for Danny to come back. Because he wasn't…he can't be._

"He promised me!" She sobbed and clutched to Stella's shoulder as she comforted her grieving friend. "He promised me he'd be here forever." Her voice drowned in the flood of tears. Standing in the hospital corridor, the team anxiously waited for the news of Danny's condition. Mac had been here many times, and he didn't want to say to Lindsay that half of him thought that Danny wasn't going to come round. He had been shot in the chest. Bull's eye. Lindsay had to break to the team that she was carrying Danny's baby, and she was advised to get a check up. She was fine, and the baby was fine…although, emotionally, Lindsay was breaking down. She knew from Mac's face that he knew that Danny needed a miracle. She was sick of the hugs and the sympathy. She just wanted her Danny. Her cowboy. She pulled away from Stella, and waved her hands, telling them that she didn't want anyone near her. She wiped away the tears and rested her head against the window as she glanced at her worst nightmare. Danny laid lifeless, no famous Messer grin on his face, no beautiful blue eyes shining at her, no Staten Island accent filling her world and convincing her, she could do anything. She glanced at the nurses and doctor in the room, trying their hardest to make his heart beat start beating again.

"Don't leave now." Lindsay muttered under her breath…but no wishing could make things change. She knew that Danny was gone…she just couldn't make herself think that. After all they had been through, how could he leave her now? When she was carrying his child, starting a family with him. She couldn't live without him.

As the doctor turned around, looking at Lindsay with a look on his face…a look that told her there was nothing more to do, Lindsay fell to her knees in choking sobs, as the team crowded around her and helped her regain her balance. She turned back and the room was empty, just Danny…his lifeless body so different. The bed seemed to make his body look so small. She wiped away the tears so that her vision wasn't blurry. It was ok for them to now go an see him, but Mac and the team agreed that Lindsay should see him alone. She slowly stood in the doorway, frozen to the spot. Why couldn't she have gone around the corner sooner, giving him the gun that he needed? HE COULD STILL BE ALIVE! She screamed inside. She just wanted to wake up. She wanted this to be just a horrible nightmare and wanted to wake up, in Danny's arms. Tears just flooded back into her eyes. She didn't want to cry. Didn't want to…for Danny's sake. He had told her…after the warehouse case, that if he had died, he didn't want her to be upset. He didn't want her to be lingering around grief all the time. He wanted her to move on. Although, she didn't want to move on ever. She wanted Danny to be in her life again, she wanted Danny to see the birth of his child, to see the child grow up to be the typical Messer child. She moved closer to his bed and pulled a chair over so she could sit and hold his lifeless hand. Every so often she just hoped that he would squeeze it, but knew that was just the grief clouding her mind. So many things that she had wanted to tell him before he left her…so many things she wanted to do with him. She wanted to get married, have a honeymoon in Italy…she collapsed her head onto his chest in tears. It was so silent in the hospital room, just the sound of her hiccupping. She smiled slightly as she remembered the countless times Danny had smiled at the way she always hiccupped after crying, and telling her it was cute. She stroked his hand, and absentmindedly brought his hand on top of her stomach.

"Turns out you were right." She choked on the tears. She tried to smile, although it pained her to. "We're going to have a boy." Although…it was only her who was going to have a baby now.

"And he's going to have your beautiful blue eyes Danny. And…" she took a moment to catch her breath, and let her heart have a chance of beating again…

"Danny I thought we always had time on out sides." She cried out. She held on tightly to his hand, and said to herself that she would never let go, at any price.

"I need you Danny." She whispered. "_We_ need you."

She stroked his face, running her fingers through the features she knew all so well, his eyes, now shut, so she couldn't see the deep blue sea inside of them. the nose she loved to nuzzle in the morning to wake him up and then…his lips…the only lips she wanted to kiss. No one would ever be the same as him and she knew that. She wouldn't let anyone love her…considering Danny had taking her heart away the minute his stopped beating.

"But Danny…I'm going to obey you…for the first time." She laughed, a quiet tearful laugh, as she remembered the many times Danny had told her to do something and she had never obeyed him.

"That's why you love me Danny…because I'm a feisty little thing." She stated aloud…then she squeezed his hand to convince herself that she was still alive…although she really wanted to die, as horrible as it sounded. She just wanted to meet Danny again.

Lindsay had sat with her deceased boyfriend for half the night, the team waiting patiently outside. it wasn't until she came outside of the room, tears streaming down her face, when she finally spoke to someone different

"I want to go home." She sobbed.

"Are you sure you're ready…to go home _alone._" Flack was the one to ask the question that was on everyone's minds. Lindsay swallowed hard and nodded.

"I have to." She whispered, as she looked back into the hospital room for the last time at her handsome boyfriend who had had his life infront of him…but now it had been taken away from him.

"no looking back." She whispered, placing her hand to her lips and putting it on the window. She leaded the way back to the elevator…back to her life.

7 years had passed since the tragic day, when Lindsay's love was washed away. She had given birth with the support of her friends, Mac being the godfather and Stella being the godmother…but there was one person who Lindsay still felt was standing by her side. She still felt his presence everywhere she went. In the labs, at home. Perhaps it was her little boy, Rory, who had his angel inside of him.

Lindsay held tightly on the hand of her 7-year-old son, his brown bushy hair was warmly tucked into a ear-flapped hat, and his hands were housed in warm gloves. His bright blue eyes shone up at her with tears, and she softly wiped them away with her thumb. He squeezed her hand and let her guide him to the angel that stood amongst the winter snow. Rory placed down a happy birthday card, and a bunch of lily's and daisies…that were Danny's favourite flowers…ever since he learned that they were Lindsay's. Lindsay couldn't resist the flow of tears which chilled her cheeks as the followed the path of old shed tears…all shed for the same reason.

They glanced up to the angel and smiled…both knowing that they were under the loving watch and care of a wonderful father for Rory, and a loving boyfriend of Lindsay's.

As a routine, they read the message that was written on the marble gravestone.

Danny Messer

1976-2008

Loving boyfriend and father

Make track's cowboy

Lindsay laughed as more tears rolled down her cheeks. She had told ropy the many moments his father and her had spent together, stories before bed so he could dream about his father…so he could build his own memories about the father he would never be with.

"Happy birthday daddy." Rory said, a hint of Danny's voice hidden in his.

And with that…the two "Messer's" walked away from the spot Danny lay in peace. An inside her head, Lindsay swore she could hear Danny speaking to her.

"I won't let go either."

She smiled, and picked her son up. it was going to take time, but she knew that she could find happiness in the little miracle her and Danny had made.


End file.
